Saturday, March 21, 2009

Another girl

All my life I wanted to have baby boys - I was such a tomboy and that made me so nervous to have a baby girl. Then I got pregnant and I didn't care if it was a boy or girl - I just wanted a healthy baby. We found out it was girl and I cried tears of joy. I didn't realize how much I would love having a girl. Amalea makes my life so much fun and I couldn't imagine life without her. Then I got pregnant again. Again, I didn't care if it was a boy or girl, but once again when I found out it was girl I cried. I am so thrilled that Amalea will have a sister and that they will be so close in age.
It's funny how you think you want one thing and then when something else happens you realize how happy you are with that thing and you can't even imagine wanting the other thing (not sure if that makes any sense). Basically, I am so excited. I will have two daughters - so fun!

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Again...

I just had another friend miscarry her baby. I don't get it. I just don't. All the excitement and joy and then it's taken away so quickly. I feel sad and a little angry.

Friday, March 6, 2009

Invisible Children

So, each year I have been teaching I have shown the documentary "Invisible Children" to my students. This year I debated whether or not to show it - I wondered if it was too much for them. However, I decided to show it because it fit well as a post discussion from the novel we just finished, "The Wave".
I have been so surprised by their responses. In many ways they are much more serious than my high school students. I'm not sure why this is a surprise to me, but it is. Many students have left in tears and most have had questions filled with frustration and anger.
We are writing letters to the president in response to the film and I have been impressed by what they have to say. I work in a fairly wealthy community and to see these students open their hearts just a little means so much to me.
One student came to me and asked where I was sending the letters and said she wanted the address herself because she wants to do something on her own.

Why is it that we, as a culture, doubt the care our teenagers have? I think we so often underestimate them - I know I do. I want to remind myself to challenge them and give them awareness because they have so much to offer this hurting and broken world.

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Lent

So, I didn't initially commit to giving up anything specific for Lent this year. I don't know why I didn't, but nothing stuck out to me as something I really need to work on doing without...and then yesterday it hit me...I need to give up searching for a new home.
We are in a lease out our current place until August so really I don't need to be looking yet. However, I am so anxious to move that I look every day to see if anything new has come on the market. It's really pretty pathetic. I know the exact neighborhood we want to live in and the schools I would want my kids in and the schools I would not want my kids in and so I think to myself "something perfect is going to come along and I don't want to miss it". And then I end up spending hours looking on multiple websites and it's just silly.
I need a break. I need to trust that when the time is right we will be able to find what we need. I need to remind myself that the time is not now. I need to not let stress rule me and cause me to panic and look for a new home. I need to be content with where we are for this time. I need to not have my entire future planned out. I need to be more flexible.
I don't know that simply stopping looking for the perfect house will help with all those areas, but I know that it will help with some and I know that it will be a challenge for me.
So, I embark (a week late) on my Lenten journey. May God bring me to the place he wants me to be.