Leaving

On Monday I had a dentist appointment - my first time away from Amalea. Everything in my wanted to call and cancel the appointment, but I knew I needed to keep it. So, I did and for one hour I was away from my baby.
I felt anxious the entire time. I was wondering how she was doing - was she crying, was she sleeping, was she happy - it was hard.

I guess that is one of the things that changes in my life now that I am a parent - worry begins to creep in and anxiety is increased. I am learning the new curves of life with a child and the new emotions that it all brings. It's hard, but I love it so much. She is absolutely worth all the anxiety, all the pain, all the worry - she is beautiful, strong, healthy (besides the eye thing), loud, animated, cuddly, warm, and so lovable.

Work

As most of you know I am not working right now - I took off two weeks before Amalea was born and am going to be taking off 9 weeks after (I get 6 weeks paid with my disability insurance, but I am taking more without pay). I will go back to work December 3 for three weeks and then it is Christmas break so I will have two weeks off.
I am enjoying the break from work and honestly haven't really been thinking or worrying about it much at all - that is until recently. I got an email yesterday from a student, another letter handwritten from a student, and a phone call from the counselor at work. It seems that my classes are really struggling with my substitute. They are having such a hard time that there are now parents involved. It's a long story to explain what is going on, but basically things I left to be taught aren't being taught and students are having a hard time getting along with my sub.
Now, this doesn't make me want to go back to work any sooner, however, it has reminded me that I have 80 kids waiting for me when I return. For now I am praying for each kid and hoping that things aren't too screwed up when I return. It should be a fun three weeks in December :-)

Jeans

I tried on my jeans today - my pre-pregnancy jeans that is. Ha. I was actually a bit impressed. I could get them on and buttoned and everything, but they sure were snug :-) I just wanted to see if I could do it yet - wishful thinking I guess.
It's a good thing I have such an active child - I should loose the baby weight pretty quickly if she keeps being this active as she grows.
I love it.

Love

I am so in love with my daughter. I know I am supposed to say that, but it really is true. People have always told me that once you have a child your definition of love is extended and I believe that. When she cries it doesn't bother me (I know it probably will in the future - it's still early) or when she poops on me (and she has) I just laugh and give her kisses. Jim and I are so incredibly lucky.