It has been so interesting for me moving to a new town and trying to make friends again. When I first moved to Thousand Oaks I really struggled to make friends - it doesn't help that I am quiet around people I don't know (though I do tend to lean on that too much at times) and can be really introverted. I did a lot of things wrong in making friends in Thousand Oaks and I see that now. I judged people too quickly, I didn't put myself out there enough, I didn't think I really needed friends all that badly - and in the end I was left feeling very alone without any good girlfriends. I had a lot of acquaintances, but not many people I knew I could share ALL of myself with (the good along with the bad).
In the end I made one really close friend, but honestly that didn't happen until after I had lived there for about 3 years. It was really hard to leave my closest friend in Thousand Oaks because she taught me so much about how I truly did and do need friends that live in close proximity and how important it is to have girlfriends I can share ALL of me with (as sad as it is I have come to realize that even with some of my closest friends I do not share all of myself).
So, here I am now in a new town again and attempting to make friends. My approach is much different this time. To begin with I know I NEED to make girlfriends and I am not too proud to say that. Also, I am being totally me from the beginning and sharing the good and the bad right from the start. I am being real, being transparent, being vulnerable, being myself - and not trying to impress others. I am not judging people, but instead I am being positive and giving people more credit than I have in the past (just being honest with how bad of a person I can be).
I don't know what friendships will develop here in Portland, but I do know that in the short time I have been here I have already gotten to know some really amazing ladies and they are people I truly hope become close friends. I am thankful that I have learned from my many mistakes in Thousand Oaks and that I am making friends here.